Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Fun with Search Terms II

So back in August I did a post on the weird search terms people find my blog with, and it was so much fun that I think I'll do similar posts irregularly. Here are a few of the oddest ones culled from my Google Analytics account...
  • enchanted aardvark sign (umm... wtf?)
  • vicks rub sex fun penis (a bit of advice: don't. Srsly). 
  • e ionian lick (kinky, a whole region of Ancient Anatolia licks stuff...)
  • famous ellipses (aren't all ellipses equally famous? or are some ellipses more equal than others?)
  • absolute nude simon singh boobs (so I thought the one about Neil deGrasse Tyson in the last edition was bad, but seriously now. Simon Singh's boobs? He doesn't even have man titties for God's sake!) 
  • chiropractic medicine in durban violence (yup, when you let a chiropractor near your spine, it's ipso facto an act of violence...)
  • witchcraft and geckos (I knew those little bastards were in league with witches! Maybe we could check whether they weigh the same as a duck...)
  • interesting family porn (all family porn is interesting, surely? well, in a deeply disgusting way that is)
  • sex enchantment of god (wow... the ultimate ego boost: enchanting god into having sex with you!)
  • woman with monkey sex (a Mexican donkey show is bad enough, but monkeys? Gross). 
  • churchill burst into flames (my history isn't all that good, but I'm pretty sure THIS never happened).
  • alien impregnation of women porno video (note to porn surfers: this is not a porn blog, let alone a Hentai porn blog, so GTFO and take your perversions with you). 
  • do my eyes change color because im evil (Gawd superstition is bad for you. No dammit, it doesn't make you evil). 
  • women shouldn't do magic (no one can do real magic, so that's a bit redundant, eh?) 
  • ionia should stick (stick and lick? Sigh).
Non-weird search terms...
It always surprises me which posts become popular, and what posts end up attracting readers from the search engines. A preposterous number of people do searches - with a dizzying array of different search terms - about chameleon camouflage. Also surprising is how many people search for that video about a cement cast of an ant colony and similarly popular (probably as a consequence of Dawkins' latest book) are terms about fox domestication.

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